The One in the middle

 

  

my Heart

Back To Black

Part 2. At least this time, I didnt let it get me like that. I'm not emotinally available, and I'm grateful 4 it.

Artist: Amy Winehouse
Album: Back to Black
Title: Back to Black

He left no time to regret
Kept his dick wet
With his same old safe bet
Me and my head high
And my tears dry
Get on without my guy
You went back to what you knew
So far removed from all that we went through
And I tread a troubled track
My odds are stacked
I'll go back to black

We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to.....

I go back to us

I love you much
It's not enough
You love blow and I love puff
And life is like a pipe
And I'm a tiny penny rolling up the walls inside

We only said goodbye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to

Black, black, black, black, black, black, black,
I go back to
I go back to

We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to


We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to black

The Game is not on that level -UPDATED

So I was doing some random music news browsing and I found this on mtvnews.com. I couldnt help it but to speak on it. The Game spent a week in county jail and upon his eeeeearly release, he hit the studio and compared that feeling to what Pac went through when Suge Bailed him out of state prison after 11 months of incarceration (for some bullshit that we all know was completely overdone and unnecesary regarding the verdict.) and went right into the studio and pretty much remained there for the last months of his life.They even stated that Pac recorded "California Love" that same night he was released when according to his book Ressurrection, he actually wrote and recorded "Ambitionz Az a Ridah" the same afternoon that he came back to Cali with Suge once he got out.
 Alright, I'm sure there's hundreds that have all had a similar experience as to what Pac went through when 
he was released because that's just what happens, you get released from incarceration. It's the BEST DAMN feeling in the world if you have found urself to be in that spot. I have and the first thing I did when I got released after the last part of my 90 with 60 actual served sentence back in '05 was bump some Pac and just thank God that I was breathing fresh outdoor air. But dude, for The Game to compare his 8 day stint for what I think was just his still immature and arrogant antics of pulling out a gun during a game of basketball on a park court and threatening to kill some dude......to what actually went on with Pac and him actually doing 11 months in a state prison in NY for something that was just too vague to actually believe but due to his public role and stature at the time with his music and views on the government, yea I think he was set up and shipped out for a min to

better benefit the government than that broad that accused his friends and him of sexual abuse. Anyway, Game got let off easily for what he was  for damn sure guilty of doing, and manages to publicly compare himself to Pac. Never on that level. He's Wescoast yea he is, but that's all he is, a rapper. He's not an MC, he's not a poet, he's not Pac, or even close on that remarkable human being to exist level. It's just one of those things that he should have kept to himself. 
don't make it a publisized moment where you compare yourself  to something that is not meant to be in your reach honestly. The Game has good tracks, mainly thanks to the Dr., but he has yet to actually evolve into something greater than just some dude that went through typical shit living in Compton and has recorded some albums that only depict that lifestyle that honestly, does not translate on that almost universal yet very personal level that Pac's music did. I think Game has everything in his reach to make Great things of not just himself, but in hip hop. He needs to evolve from rap. And stop comparing himself to Pac. Nobody in this lifetime will be even close to what Pac still is. Alright I'm done. I just couldnt help but 2 express a feeling right....lates. oh yea, here's the article.


Mar 18 2008 5:15 PM EDT
Game Headed Straight To Studio After Leaving Jail To Make 'Inspirational' Track, 'Big Dreams,' With Cool & Dre

'It's like when 'Pac came outta prison and did 'California Love' that same night,' Dre says.
By Jayson Rodriguez
The Game wasted no time getting to the studio after his exit from prison last week.
On Wednesday night, the California rapper recorded the Cool & Dre-produced "Big Dreams," the first single from his upcoming album, L.A.X., due in June. By the weekend, the track was mixed and leaked to the Web.
"Right now, he's like 'Pac," Dre told MTV News the day after the track was recorded. "It's like when 'Pac came outta prison and did 'California Love' that same night.
"Lyrically, he's somewhere else right now," the producer added.
On the pulsating number, Game's forceful flow and sharp tongue attack the beat.
"Irv Gotti know I'mma murderer/ Half of the n---as beefing with me I never heard of them/ If I was the old me I would murder them/ Matter fact, if I was the old me, I would Curtis them," he spits.
Dre said he and Cool managed to work on two other tracks, "Make the World Go 'Round" and "Red Magic," during their session.
"When he was going to jail ... he said he didn't know how long he's gonna be going in for," Dre explained. "But he was like, 'When I come out, I'm ready to go.' So the day he got out, we got the phone call, like, 'Yo, come to L.A. right now.' So me and Cool jumped on the plane."
Game ended up doing only eight days of a scheduled 60-day jail sentence. The rapper was released March 9 from the Twin Towers Correctional Facility in California due to overpopulation. He was jailed because of an incident last year when the rapper threatened another man during a pickup basketball game and was found to have a firearm in a school zone.
His attorney confirmed his release to several media outlets, but his management camp issued a statement claiming the rapper had instead been transferred to another facility. A representative with the prison confirmed Game's release to MTV News.


  update 3/25/008 4:25pm
  I had read this article in XXL years ago when the issue celebrated Pac's "ALL EYEZ ON ME" album's anniverssary. They interviewed the key roles in the making of that album like Daz, Kurupt, Johnny J, Nate Dogg, Richie Rich and other producers that witnessed the makings and had them do commentary for every track. This is what they said about "Ambitonz as a ridah...."
 
"Ambitionz Az A Ridah" Produced by Dat Nigga Daz

Kurupt: First day he came home, "Ambitionz Az A Ridah"-that was the first record that he did. Suge brought him in. The word went through the office that 'Pac was home. Everybody [who was] at the studio at that time was up there. I came a little bit later, and when i came, Daz already had the beat started. 'Pac wasn't in the studio for any more than 45 minutes before he had his first verse done and laid. that fast. He didn't even wanna chill; all he wanted to do was get on the mic. Whatever day he landed in Los Angeles, two hours after he landed, he had his first verse laid.

Dave Aron: That's the first song I ever did with 2pac. The day he got out of jail, he didn't go to the clubs. He didn't go try to meet women. He went straight to the studio like he was on a mission, and he recorded "Ambitionz Az A Ridah" and "I ain't Mad At Cha." 2pac came in, and he was fresh out of jail. I seen them give him his Death Row Medallion that same night. And then he came right in. He was ready to go. He was very hyped, very focused, a lot of energy-mad energy. And you could tell he was really one a mission. He really had a real vision of what was going on, and he wanted to get a lot done in that short amount of time.

Daz: The idea came from the me sampling Pee Wee Herman. So if you listen to Pee Wee Herman [the Champs' "Tequila"], I just put the gangsta twist on it. I gave it to 'Pac. Came back to the studio, and it was done.

A little more now

listening to: "Falling away with you" by Muse

Cant trust it anymore

This heart of mine just cant be trusted anymore. I've pretty much sealed off any entry into my heart. And who knows when that will come to change. Not to quote Danity Kane, but the last relationship I was in did leave me damaged, as well as the expectations that I have not just with a relationship but with the man I choose to be in it. It's not like Ernie was the best thing ever, but he was the closest to what I've always wanted in all aspects. The intensity of the entire thing is what ruined me. Passion overtook me when I really didn't expect it to. Now I'm just on autopilot when it comes to romance. If there is an opportunity, I just don't see it. The guys who have tried to approach me have pretty much not been taken seriously from the jump off. I've been iceboxing it this whole time to avoid getting into something that will just result in heartbreak I guess. Luis has been writing me from prison and has actually stated that he would want to pursue something with me upon his release in August. finally. wow though. Had this been 2006 I might have felt..something. but when I read that letter I just shook my head. My love for him is so much different now. Not at all like it was back then. And it cant be like that ever again. I don't know if to truly trust Rudy with long term plans time because we are so far from each other. But he's in my heart sometimes.  The only person that I've actually spent time with lately and actually gotten to know somewhat on a better level is Paul, who is the complete opposite of Ernie and is just a genuine sweetheart. from what I've seen in this last week that we've been around each other. There's that little part of me that wants to trust it just a little, give it a little bit of faith even......but then the majority goes with the reality, 'don't do it. Just enjoy what it is. because that's probably all it is and will be.' so that way i don't disappoint myself in any way. I don't really think that I win in any situation though.  I'm a hopeless romantic that thrives off of love. And for the last 6 months, it's been an icebox with it. I just won't allow myself to trust it. What's going to change it I think just really relay's on who. Or who I would want it to be. That's where it gets complicated.
listening to:   "unravel" by Bjork