Sometimes

It doesn't take a lot to make me happy. Yesterday, It was taking out all the books I had in a box in the garage and going trhough them and putting them in my room. All the books that I've acumulated from 1999-2005. Even my old sketchbooks with battle rhymes, words of thought and memories all captured in pictures and words from those times. I swear I felt like I was back in my old room, looking through all this. "I got memories". Haha..listening to the Icebox remix is crazy right now cos sometimes, I feel like it really talk about what it is right now. With some things. "Trippin on what's in front of you cos you're looking behind ya"...That's the truth! Maybe I should b more cold. Wait, wasn't that a goal for me this year? Stop caring so much about others? hmm. I don't think I can do that now that I've been sober for the longest. Nah, it's just more about the fact that I have to care about myself over everything right now. Like how crazy it's making me that I don't have any money since I've been unemployed, although I am working on that. Yes, I kinda had refused the idea of doing anything involving customer service, however, there's isn't much of another option around here. So mayb Verizon or T-Mobile will hook it up. I applied 4 Verizon earlier today...we'll see whats up with that. On a lighter note, I can't wait to go back to Cali! I was hoping on doing that sometime this week..so I could be there this weekend..and stay a week.....but since my brokeness has to wait for moms to supply the funds for that trip, it's on her to see when I go...and she's actually coming back on Friday nite....that way the house doesn't stay by itself, and I don't have to take Chanel with me either. So I'm thinking maybe next Monday night. I want to see Ernie before I go, but he went on his own mish this week and I don't know when he comes back either. Yea, I don't think he really cares about what I do sometimes...or what happens to me. That might be because I'm not up to much right now, but don't ever think I'm predictable. Never. I have too much intention to not do anything with it, ya dig? That's why I need to bounce for a minute and breath some of those memories back to life. The good ones, filled with all my friends from back then...just to catch up. Just like those books, remember who I was because it made me into who I am..and there's no one that loves me more than me. Let the good times roll.

Listening to: "Initiated" by Makaveli, Daz & Kurupt 'Thug Pound'